Where do I begin…

I think you can’t really measure easy because each persons standard of easy is different. I may live near the beach and have sun almost every day. But I also have to search my soul for all the dark places Jesus is asking me to give to him, and then actually surrender them to the cross. I’m having to retrain my brain and my habits. I’m redefining my identity, removing the labels the world has placed upon me, as well as replacing the labels, lies and masks I’ve given to myself. Then taking all those and transforming them to a biblical based identity. So when someone says oh but you live in Hawaii it must be such an easy life. On one hand yes it is. On the other I’m being stretched in ways I never even knew were possible.

One of the things God has revealed to me is there was lies I was believing in my testimony. I thought I’d dealt with the big things in my life, which I have. I’ve found an insane amount of freedom from the “big dark sins” I was going to take to the grave. But in that freedom I took on an identity that wasn’t mine to take on. In class we took all the labels (including ones that could have been good but were defining our identity instead of Jesus) lies, and masks and nailed them to the cross then washed our hands with water and anointed ourselves with oil. I’d done something similar to this before. There is something so powerful about symbolically doing this, as it’s a physical action that you’re going to battle to declare that Satan no longer has any power over those labels, lies or masks. This time was just as freeing.

After nailing and anointing, I returned to my spot in the room and began to bask in the presence of Jesus. I felt like the Lord invited me to dance. I was a princess on her coronation day, dancing with her proud king and father. In this sweet moment I felt like the Lord said to me.

“My Beloved Natalie,

Today you’re finally stepping out in true grace. My daughter you’re becoming who I designed you to be. I dance in delight with you. You are new. This is your coronation my princess. Stepping into true freedom you no longer need to hide yourself from me. I’m not afraid of the lies, and temptations or sin. You’re my daughter.

There is so much power in my name. You have authority.”

I think the best gift this week has given me in learning about identity is that I feel like I can come as I am in all my brokenness to Jesus, my friend. I can have a conversation with him. I no longer need to hide myself from him. He already knows me, so there is really no point. I feel like this entire DTS is so God can rid me of my old identity and revive me into who I am really supposed to me. As I talked about before maybe not on here but on an instagram post instead. But God gave me a word picture of Him painting a canvas in front of me. Showing me all of who I am. Already he’s painted significant things on that canvas.

These are the “labels” God has given to me already, even before Identity week. My first colour on the canvas was yellow, and it stands for Fathered, this is the most significant of all. The next one was Green and it stands for Leader, the third one was Pink and it stands for Loved.  I got another one this week too.  I got the colour Gold and it stands for Free. I think the Gold comes from the idea of the Japanese art form of taking broken pottery and mending it with gold. Kintsukuroi is what it’s called. Basically when you have a broken piece of pottery you then repair the cracks with Gold. That’s what Jesus did on the cross for me. I love that I get to see Him visually pain who I am to Him.

Another one of the biggest things that stood out to me other than the previously mentioned was that until we know our worth in Christ we’ll not be able to walk out in fullness all that God has in store for us. Our culture is so fixated on who people tell us we are. We’re all looking for an identity, it’s a fundamental part of being human. But If we’re looking for confirmation from other people especially if they aren’t speaking biblical truth and life over you then you will have a distorted identity and that can damage our ability to communicate, because we are speaking out opinions based on labels that actually don’t apply to ourselves.

As you can see I’ve been learning so much and it’s like information overload. So living in Hawaii is fantastic, I’m actually so blown away that I live here. I can’t put it into words. But It’s also been the most stretching time, going through spiritual brain surgery and heart surgery. But it’s the kind of growth you just long for, and I’m so thankful for that.

Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope.

Romans 5: 3-4

If you’ve made it through till now. Thank you for taking the time to read a piece of my heart. I feel like it’s a post that’s been all over the place, but so is my brain these days. I love you all, and thank you again for being a part of this crazy journey.

Love,
Natrrow.

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Hello,

It’s officially August and I’ve been living in Hawaii for a month as of today. It’s so surreal. When I’m not in class I’m usually adventuring with friends seeing this insanely beautiful island that I’m so blessed to live on.

This past weeks topic was pretty heavy. We learned about having a Biblical World View, but with that we learned about the Secular World View and Eastern World View. One of the biggest things I took away from this week was understanding the Hindu religion. I come from an area where we have a lot of East Indians and a lot of Hindus. It was so cool to get an understanding. But with that, I also learned how drastic it is from what I believe. I wont go into too much of it because that’s not the point of the post. But it was hard to swallow all of it.

The second biggest thing that impacted me was learning how even from the very beginning of creation, God had a plan for Jesus. There is foreshadowing all through out Genesis after Adam and Eve sinned. I’ve always been told how excruciating the crucifixion was, but it never hit me the way it did this time. As our teacher explained in more detail how brutal it was and how the nails actually would have gone through the wrists, because the weight of his body would have ripped the nail out in between his fingers. The equivalent of that kind of pain would be like getting a nail hammered into your funny bone. I almost threw up. This time hearing this story it wasn’t just someone named Jesus that I knew was a part of the trinity and who had come to save me from my sins. No, It was my friend upon that cross. It wrecked me with the heaviness. That kind of sacrifice is such a declaration of love.

Needless to say after that kind of content I needed a fun weekend.

So some friends and I piled into an Uber (which I seriously wish Vancouver had, come on Vancity get with the program). We were trying to find this place called Queens Bath. We ended up asking a local who pointed us half way down the island I swear. We were really confused as to why we were going so far when our other friends had said it was a 45 minute from campus. When we got there I realized I’d been here before and this wasn’t where we wanted to go. It was a fresh water cave where you could swim. Cool but not where we wanted to go.

We turned around and called a friend for directions. Finally after a $60 Uber ride we made it to the place. Praise Jesus our Uber driver offered us a free ride from there back to campus when ever we wanted it. It was the most stunning location. We had a mini photoshoot (until my camera died), we swam with fish, and got tossed in the waves. I was the only one who walked away with out a little injury. But we went back the next day for a roommates birthday to have a photoshoot. I’m so blessed to be able to practice my photography and bless the beautiful women around me. I’ll do a post on the birthday photoshoot soon.

Here’s some photos from round one at Queens Bath.

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Until the next adventure.

Love,
Nattrow.

Hello,

Ah Valentine’s Day, the day all about love. I find either people love this holiday or they hate it. I used to be on the hate side, but being on that side was dark and cynical and well, pretty exhausting. I say exhausting because I had to pretend I hated it (however it kept my acting skills in shape) but deep down, all I wanted was to love others and be loved. So I decided to embrace it and look at it as a day filled with an extra overflow of love. I also got a boyfriend this year so it didn’t take much to convince me to embrace it. I find V-Day (not related to the II world war) is also the perfect day to show grace to your neighbor, especially when they park their truck in front of your driveway.

With Valentine’s there is an abundance of sweets, because let’s be real here, the best way to anyone’s heart male or female is through their stomach, yes even those on a diet. Hand them a sweet acai bowl and you’re golden. So I though I’d get in the spirit and make some easy Valentine’s snacks. These are cute recipes I was inspired by on Pinterest, because Pinterest is life, aside from Blenz and Jesus.

CONVERSATION HEART “TIC TAC TOE” CRACKERS

The first snack is quite fun and easy of course, hence the title. The Pinterest recipe that I saw used graham crackers and conversation hearts, but since I’m gluten-free I wanted to be able to incorporate my diet into this love filled day. So I used S’moreables, you can pick these up at your local superstore or any grocery store that has a health food section will probably have them. They taste pretty similar to the real thing which is a deal breaker if you’re like me.

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Continue reading “Easy Valentine’s Treats”

Heyo!

Happy Wednesday or Humpday if you will. I don’t know about you but I am currently snowed in under ten inches of snow. So I think that there is nothing better than to spend your day pampering yourself and why not start with a great face mask? That way your skin will be prepped and ready to finish out the week. Just remember only one more day till Friday. You can do this in the morning if you’re one of the lucky ones that don’t have to start your day early or at night to wind down after a long day.  My favourite masks are by the amazing brand Origins.

Continue reading “Origins: Skin Care”

Hello,

Happy New Year! It’s been a while. Once the New year comes, everyone starts saying “New Year, New Me”. I’ve seen that quote posted on almost every social media site, it’s actually a little excessive. However it did get me thinking, what would a new me look like? and therefore it got me thinking about my hopes, dreams and goals for the New Year.

Some of my goals are very meaningful to me, and those are the ones that I’ll try to accomplish to the best of my ability. Others however are kind of just on the list, though they are things I want to do, if they don’t happen I won’t be too torn up about it. For the goals I really cared about I wanted to find a way to make them seem attainable. So instead of writing a lengthy list of things I want to do this year I wrote steps to accomplish each goal. That way it broke it down and made it less overwhelming and daunting when I looked at a list a mile long.

Here’s some examples of my goals and steps I’m going to take to achieve them.

1. Drink more water.

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Continue reading “New Year, New Me.”

Hello,

I swear each year seems to fly by faster and faster. It’s already September and pumpkin is everywhere. I’m not ready to say good-bye to this summer, after all I actually enjoyed it much more than I did my last. So here’s my favourites for the month of August. It’s a shorter list mostly because I was so busy and can’t remember the things I was obsessed with this month. With out further a due, here we go.

1. NIKE SWIM SUIT

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Continue reading “August Favourites”

Hello,

A while back in my post about backyard camping I mentioned that I peaced out from the shin dig to head to a photo shoot, well this was it.

Back in July I headed downtown Vancouver for a photo shoot with DISTRICT’ in partnership with Drammatico Chi handbags. I was approached by one of the photographers who said they were taking picture’s of local bloggers, and the style of the shoot was “your interpretation of classy and timeless”.  I of course was honoured to be asked and jumped at the opportunity, being an actor, I do love the camera. I however don’t exactly consider myself super stylish. The way I dress is either super casual or super dressy (depending on the occasion) and I don’t really have a “style” other than minimal. I am not going to lie I fretted about this like no body’s business. But then I decided to embrace ME and this was the result.

Natalie Farrow District'

Continue reading “Photoshoot with DISTRICT’ and DRAMMATICO CHI”